Goodness, I can't express how thankful I am that Friday is here and the weekend is just hours away! It has been a really, really long week around here, mostly because my nights were filled with plans and commitments and left little time to just relax. Last night though, I changed into my pj's the second I walked in the door, crawled into my bed at 4:45 PM with a good book, and didn't leave (except to pee every 25 minutes because PREGNANCY) til this morning. My husband is a saint and he even brought my dinner to me in bed and it was exactly what I needed.
Usually I would tell you some highs and lows of the week, but today I just want to share with you something I read in Lara Casey's book, Make It Happen. Before I do so, if you haven't read this book, it should be up next on your list because its rocking my world. I usually shy away from books like this, partially because I haven't always known what my dreams and passions actually were, and I felt some shame for that, like something was wrong with me. Anyway, that is something I've been working through and this book is so encouraging, so practical, and so authentic I can't put it down. Sorry for the ramble train. What I wanted to share with you was this quote:
Whatever you are going through right now, if it's humbling you, making you pray, bringing you to your knees and making you feel like you cannot do this alone, maybe there is a reason-a glorious, beautiful reason. -Lara Casey, Make It Happen
When I read this the other night, I felt my eyes instantly well up with tears. Not in a bad way, because life is certainly sweet and we've been overwhelmed by the Lord's goodness over and over lately, but because pregnancy, it absolutely brings me to my knees daily. I've never been as aware of my need for God's wisdom and grace as I have been the past five months or so. There are so many things I cannot control, so many adult things we are in the process of doing, so many unknowns and countless decisions we have to weigh and it is overwhelming and scary but I have found so much peace in knowing that this baby I am carrying was God's child before He was mine and that God has perfect plans for his life.
When I've found myself stuck in fear, grasping on to whatever I think I can control and plan and organize into going my way, I can surrender it all to a God who never fails and who's love for us is real and unchanging. I've been reminded how to pray really big prayers, prayers that seem impossible and I'm trusting God with our life, with our finances, with our baby, with our careers, with our marriage, and everything else because I know this to be true: God has it. He's got this under control. Whether or not life goes according to my plan and my desires, I know God ultimately is in control so I can relax, knowing I don't have to be.