Hello lovely readers of Happy is a Choice! I’m Nicole, the runner and brunch fanatic over at Not Before my Tea.
I know that we just met so I don’t want to come off too strong, but I just really wanted to wish you all a very happy Day Before George Washington’s Birthday Celebration. Other than Arbor Day, this is by far my favorite obscure and somewhat irrelevant holiday… and I’m so glad to be sharing it with you!
I wanted to go all out celebrating this year but you know how it goes: you get busy, one thing leads to another, and before you know it, the big day just sneaks right up on you. That and I couldn’t find 300 miniature white wigs to top the celebratory cupcakes I had planned. (Apparently Target does have its limits.)
I’m here though and I don’t want to leave without doing at least something to celebrate George’s big day. So instead of miniature wigged cakes, I have this for you instead: a list of how George Washington and running are kind of the same thing.
1. They both really set things off on the right foot
Whether you’re starting a world superpower or starting your morning, our first president and a good run both get you going in the right direction. However, I wouldn’t recommend swapping the two (although I guess breakfast with George really wouldn’t be all that bad).
2. They’re both great for the environment.
Last year (my twenty-third year of life), I learned for the first time that my uncle wears a toupee. My whole life was suddenly a lie.
And just like my uncle’s luscious locks, that story about George Washington cutting down a cherry tree is a myth.
Turns out, little George was actually great for the environment – no tree chopping whatsoever (that we know of, I guess). And just like our environmentally friendly leader, running is also great for planet Earth. No smog, no litter, no traffic. The hardcore ones even do a bit of fertilizing for us! (Too much?)
3. Both look great on paper…
You can’t deny that George Washington does the dollar bill better than anyone. Frankly, I think he rocks the "three shades of green look" better than the Jolly Green Giant, and that’s what that guy does for a living. George knows how to run a country but what he really knows is how to look great on that paper.
And what else looks great on paper? You guessed it: running. Why else do you think all your Facebook friends bombard you with their humble-brag running statuses? Because every runner knows that a mile not documented is a mile wasted.
4. …but both will kick your butt in real life.
Tree-loving, six-year-old George was evidently a huge softie but American Revolution Washington? He was having none of that. I can guarantee more than a handful British soldiers woke up the morning after facing Washington thinking, “That was a mistake.”
And that’s exactly how you feel after a hard workout. Granted, a few days later when your butt looks awesome or you PR in a race, you’re glad you did it. But the morning after mile repeats? Your burning legs are telling you that you just made a huge mistake.
5. They both rule.
Ok, so maybe this one is a cop out. But it’s true. George Washington and running: both awesome. America.
And that's that. I know this wasn't as informative as what Brittany usually has for all of you, but hopefully you were able to pick up a fact or two to impress your guests while they're playing "Pin the Tail on the Revolutionary Steed" at your First President Party tonight. Just remember: lay off the prohibition beverages and don't do anything George wouldn't do!